Ruth

 

borrowed from https://twitter.com/karijobe/status/347716080753598464/photo/1

Ruth.

What a woman! She willingly up roots her entire life to follow her mother in law, to stay with her and move to a strange land. She rejects the gods of her childhood, the life she was raised in to follow the one and only God. 

I can relate. I moved, completely uprooted my life, found a new job, moved to a strange house and surrounded myself with people I do not know (twice in 2 years!). And it is terrifying! Not to mention I have terrible anxiety. This has definitely doubled it. At least. 

So, I talked in an earlier post about how Ruth refused to leave Naomi. In fact, she went as far to say she would follow Naomi AND her God. She left the gods of her family to follow God. Now the bible doesn't say why or how she came to faith, just that God had chosen her. This woman had such faith in God that she trusted in Him completely to care for her. She left everything she knew to follow Naomi's God back to the promised land. She trusted in God's plan for her life.

When they move back, God provides work and food for Ruth to be able to care for Naomi. He provides a family member willing to care for her and Naomi and continue their family line. God thinks of everything! And it is not a smooth, straight forward path. I am sure there were many times that Ruth wondered where God was leading her. She wandered from field to field for food. God lead her to Boaz's field. Naomi explained to have Ruth lay at Boaz's feet, yet did not reveal why. Boaz even had to negotiate with a closer relative to be the one to care for Ruth and Naomi. But God saw everything through perfectly. And seeing the big picture, this was ALL a part of God's plan of salvation.

God has a plan, I have to trust He has a plan! Things have not been easy, the road has been FAR from smooth for me. But I am seeing just a tiny bit of the plan. One small agonizing step at a time, a few victories, a lot of failures. What is it all coming to??

The story of Ruth reminds me that even for her there were so many twists and turns. But it all worked out for her benefit and God's glory. And though the story seems short, it in fact probably took course over a long period of time.

Wait on God. Wait for His timing. Trust in His plan.
God give me strength.

~Mandy

Naomi

I wanted to start writing about women in the bible and I wanted to start with Ruth. I feel a connection with this woman for some reason. But as I started reading about her, I was struck by another woman in this story.

Naomi.

We don't know a whole lot about this woman. But the story of Ruth starts with the story of Naomi. So let's start at the beginning. There is a famine in Israel. Elimelech and Naomi and their 2 sons move away to follow the food. I am sure the worry to feed her family was almost as much as leaving her homeland. They were also moving into a land whose people served other gods. She and her husband along with their two sons pack up and move away to where they can find food to eat. They are refugees in a strange land with no family connections or land.

Some time later, (the bible doesn't say how much time has passed) Elimelech dies. She is left with 2 sons and no husband. Her sons take unbelieving wives. And then 10 years later, both her sons die. So now Naomi is left without someone to care for her, she also has 2 daughters-in-law who are left in the same situation. So Naomi does what anyone else in her spot would do. She packs up and heads back to her homeland, my guess is in desperate hopes SOMEONE in her family will take her in. She hears in the fields that God has visited Israel. The famine is over. She leaves and her daughters-in-law come with.

At one point Naomi tells them to go back "to their mothers house". They weep and say they will continue on with her. When Naomi insists, Orpah goes back to the safety of her homeland and her family. But Ruth, she clings to Naomi and goes with her (more on this later).

Now, I am sure Naomi is confused. Why would this girl leave everything she had behind, all the familiarity of her gods and the connections of her family,? He chance to have another life with someone from her homeland. But Ruth so sweetly professes her faith in God and her insistance in going along. Naomi protests no more. Not only that, it appears Naomi comes to care for Ruth as she would for her own daughter as seen in later chapters.

This woman is so strong. She trusts God to provide even if it means moving to a strange land with her family. She loses all the important people in her life. She hears God has provided for her people and heads back to her homeland. Even later she helps Ruth to provide for them and carry on the family, helping her have new happiness.

My mother in law is the most amazing woman. I was friends with her before dating my husband and I still believe we are friends to this day. She is so bright and upbeat. If it is God's will one day and we have kids, I want to raise them to be like the wonderful people all her children have turned out to be. She reminds me of Naomi. She has taken me in like a daughter and I have had less doubts being in my own strange land with her here. I really see the love of God in her. I aspire to be able to shine the light of Christ like she can. She always seems to be happy, seeing the joy in many situations. She is a rock in my life and I love her as I do my own mother.

God, please help me to see the light in the dark places, to trust in the path you have sent me on. Please help me to be a woman of faith, trusting in you, leaning on your strength. 

Reminders

borrowed from https://www.unexpectedelegance.com/diy-clipboard/

This.

This text has been "haunting" me since I found it yesterday. It is a reminder. One I have all too forgotten. It's so easy to get caught up in daily life. So easy to forget and struggle through this life.

There have been a lot of things going on the past few years.

Jeff and I got married.
Jeff lost his job.
We bought a house
He got hurt at work and couldn't help provide.
He had to go back to school in the end after already struggling to make ends meet.
Jeff found he loves what he is doing in school.
I totaled my truck.
Work has not been going so well for me.
Jeff is on the job hunt.
and on and on....

Seems for every up there is a down. Every time something goes right something else goes terribly, terribly wrong. In big ways. It's exhausting. To live in the fear of both the good and the bad times. It has made me always scared. Scared of the good times because I know that then comes the bad. Scared of the bad times because sometimes along comes worse. And anxious. Oh, so anxious. Places and event I used to love taken from me as a monster of fear grows inside my chest.

And anger

Anger at myself. Anger at others. Anger at God. Why? Why would a loving God put me through so much? I don't understand. Life has become about going through the motions. Attend work. sleep, eat. Repeat. Avoid church, crowds, friends. Repeat. Isolate, cry, be angry. Repeat. A never ending cycle.

And then in all this, I see this is not who I am and certainly not who I wanted to become and cannot be someone I stay. Honestly, I could not have come to this realization on, my own. Now, I see it as God's hand. With the help of some very important people in my life, I am begining to see me through their eyes.  And let me tell you it isn't pretty.

I. am. a. mess.

Quite literally. What happened? How did I let it get so far? The fear has literally been choking the life out of me. The anger at God, making me unable to feel Him, anywhere. Not even in worship and songs where I used to feel so close. The words, empty. The crowds, terrifying. The devil, plotting. Whispering to me his lies. Fanning the flames of anger until my heart is almost consumed and turned to ash. Ever present. Ever terrifying.

But then this verse hit me like a slap in the face. "The LORD your GOD will be with you wherever you go." With my demons, He is there. Through the anger, He is there. Through the fear, He is THERE. Here I am feeling so alone, afraid, empty. And God is there patiently waiting.

SO here is to trying again. to rebuild, restart and renew my relationship with God. I know what to do and how but the habits, they died out long ago. Quiet time with God. Reading His word. Pouring out my soul to him. And trusting Him to lead the way and work in my heart. I have filled my life with so much stuff and packed it full that I didn't realize how much I was missing and for how long.

So hears to new starts. I think I'll start with Ruth. Fitting for how I feel. A stranger in a new land with few family and familiar with no one. She trusted God to take care of her and He provided a way. I'm jealous of her trust. It's such a hard thing.

"Be strong and courageous"

And here I go. Pray for me friends. I need all the help I can get

~Mandy